Friday, September 14, 2007

Bigger News

I think I'm gonna puke.

My doctor called tonight and told me several, disturbing things. She seems to think that, according to my calendar dates, I should stick to my original due date. She seems to think that I am "just having another one of your big boys!". When I told her how confident the tech was about the baby measuring 16 weeks, she just said again that that wasn't necessarily so.

My thyroid med needs to be raised again, but that's no big deal.

She never mentioned anything about the fibroid tumor because she told me that the ultrasound showed that I had something called Amniotic Band Syndrome (I thought the tech had spent an unusually long time with me for the reason of the suspected date discrepancy...she never mentioned that she had spied these "amniotic bands") and that after my 17 week/20 week (whichever, still not sure about the due date, remember) appointment, she will direct me to a place where I can get a higher level ultrasound to determine if the ABS is or will affect our boy.

Go ahead, check out ABS and try not to puke.

I am not sleeping and it's 3 am because I only just checked it out right now. We had guests earlier when she called and I was so tired that I went to sleep intending to check this out in the morning. Butch got home from Iowa one day early and we are going to Mass at 7:45 this am so I went to bed early. So much for that. My doctor said that the good news is that it looks like there's a lot of space between these amniotic bands and the baby. I did see that usually the ABS affects babies most severely in the 1st trimester (which by both dates, I'm out of now). I just can't get the mental image of one of those evil bands wrapping around my baby's umbilical cord or neck at any point during gestation and then...

Another good thing is that (from looking it up on the internet) I found out that it CAN be misdiagnosed on ultrasound. Maybe when I go for my next ultrasound they will find everything normal and fine? This ain't my first rodeo. I'm not supposed to have any surprised after all these kids, right? Right? How the heck am I supposed to wait for 4 weeks to find out if my baby is going to be missing digits, have cleft lip or palate, missing limbs, or die in utero?????

Sorry to draw you into my worry party.

Okay, I have this theory. What if my "monthly" that I had at 3 weeks gestation was really a loss of a twin? What if that caused the amniotic bands to form? What if the doctor is right and I really am only 14 weeks now instead of 17 and my baby is big and that will help when the baby has to be born early because of some complication due to the ABS? All of my other babies were due date predicted by the size of the baby during an ultrasound and were all spot on. That makes me think that the tech was right and that I really am now 17 weeks along. If the doctor is wrong on my date and I deliver too late or what if she's right and I'm wrong and it's too early (thinking I'm terribly overdue, or too early) what if the baby's lungs are immature, or what if the baby is too big (they tend to be too big ANYWAY)? Oh, I really hate all of the combinations of this line of thinking.

I'd better go to bed now before I drive myself even crazier.