(This picture was taken right around the time we got engaged...six months after we met! It's also one of the ONLY pictures I have of Butch with a beard! He never grows it because it itches him WAY too much and he can't have one at work. I just got this from my grandma the other day. She's moving and gave us grandkids our albums she lovingly made for each of us. I had forgotten all about this picture!)
I have told this story so many times that I feel like every one's heard it! Shelly just requested it in my comment box, so here goes:
(stop reading if you've heard this one!)
ONCE upon a time, I was eighteen and just graduated from high school. It was the lovely month of June and I was looking forward to a summer of work before I started a technical college in the fall with the hopes of becoming an LPN (or something...wasn't quite sure about that one) and enjoying my freedom.
I only had one trip planned for the summer and that was to go to North Dakota where I would spend a week as a camp counselor (my third year) at an Indian reservation (2nd and 3rd graders).
My friend, Jen called me out of the blue and asked me if I would like to go out with a friend of her new boyfriend (she had fixed me up like this before and it had resulted in a nice, but ultimately wrong relationship that lasted a few months the year before).
My answer to her went something like this, "UGH! NO! I am going to my cousin's wedding on that weekend and I really want to go to the reception. It's going to be so fun and the music is supposed to be awesome! What is the deal with this guy anyway...is he cute?"
She proceeded to tell me that he was cute, that he was her boyfriends best friend and neighbor since childhood, and that he had recently broken up with a psycho girlfriend who, incidentally, came over to his apartment while Jen was there with her boyfriend visiting. Psycho came knocking on the door (according to Jen) and, drunk as a skunk, demanded Butch to give her a ride home or it would be on his conscience if she died in a car crash. Butch didn't give in to her psycho-ness and told her to leave (I think he called a cab, it's a little sketchy at this point). So, Jen figured he could do much better and she was trying to fix him up with ME!
I gave in, just because Jen kept after me and making me feel guilty (it wasn't hard to do that back then) and we got ready that Saturday night (after I attended the wedding...I'll always remember my cousin's anniversary was June 15th, 1991!) for our "big date" that supposedly the boys were in charge of planning. Mmmmhmmm. We called them and they said, "We thought YOU were making the plan.". So, we went over to Butch's parent's house (he still lived in the cities then and was visiting for the weekend), planless, to meet this dude I didn't really know anything about except he had a psycho ex-girlfriend and that Jen thought he was cute.
Not very promising sounding? I was NOT happy with the situation, and I wanted nothing more than to bag the whole night and join my family at the reception that I wanted to go to in the FIRST place!
So, I sat and grumbled the whole way to the house (he only grew up about 15 miles from me in a town about two towns away) and kicked myself for suckering into the guilt-fest given to me by my friend.
When we arrived at his house, Chad and Butch were playing cribbage at the kitchen table and I was introduced to them both. They finished their game (I was both repelled by the cribbage game-because my dad never taught us girls that game...only the boys and that always made me mad...and attracted-it was cool that he did the things that the men I loved knew how to do. WOW, was that kind of a strange revelation there? It played perfectly into my theory that I have now; that we look for the things we love about our family in our spouses and friends!) and I stood there stupidly forgetting which one was "Butch"...you know...the one I was supposed to be hooked up with? I was hoping it was the "cute one" (no offence to Chad, they were both cute, but I thought one was more my type: tall, dark, and handsome!) so I took a deep breath and asked again who was who. YAY! Butch was the cute one!
We all hemmed and hawed about what we should do on our "date" and we came to the conclusion that we should watch a movie (Butch's mom was a movie-pirate galore...she had hundreds of movies on VHS at the time!). We watched "When Harry Met Sally" which I had never had any interest in before, but found absolutely HILARIOUS and perfect for a first date that night. It is a classic, don't you think?
During the movie, I was acutely aware of the fact that Butch was sitting across the room (due to the movie viewing arrangement) and that, in retrospect, a movie wasn't really a good idea for a first date and getting to know one another! I had my hair up in a "do" for the wedding, so I took it out of my pins to be more comfortable. Did I know what this would do to Butch? You darn tootin' I did! Yeah, I didn't know him yet...and yeah, it was a little mean to put that temptation in front of a guy when he didn't even know if I would last through ONE date, but I was feeling kind of brave and more than a little "I don't care" about what happened with my life at that point. So, I decided to (literally) let down my hair. I knew what that move did to any red-blooded dude and I didn't CARE! I was pulling out all the stops that night, I tell you (heehee, I didn't have any "moves". I was a good girl so I had to keep the fire going, if you know what I mean. Us good girls didn't just "give it all up" so we had to learn how to be mysterious!)!
You see, I had had lots and lots of dates and boyfriends in high school and I was TIRED of it all. I had looked into maybe becoming a nurse so I could have a useful skill when I went to Guatemala to be a missionary...or something like that. I was even thinking about becoming a nun because it seemed like there was no boy/man who could really be the "one" and I was always dissatisfied by something in their personality. I really thought it was me. I never blamed any guy for my problems with their personality. I rarely came across any true "jerks" it's just that, after "going with" someone for a while, I would get bored, wonder what it would be like to "go with" so-and-so (a different guy I was attracted to at the time), and then break up with the guy knowing that it wasn't fair that I was having feelings for someone else. That was very fair of me, don't you think?
After the movie, Chad and Jen went out for a walk to have some "alone time" and left Butch and I sitting there like a couple of dorks, wondering what the heck to talk about. Well, it turns out that he likes to talk almost as much as me, so we had NO problem in that arena! We chatted nicely about many things, including the stuff in the paragraph above! We went for a walk, too, to continue the conversation and it was such a nice night. I don't remember the other things we talked about, but I DO remember that we both expressed that we would probably never get married (to anyone...we weren't really together, remember? so we were just talking about ourselves!) and we would most definitely never have kids!
Okay. I'll give you a moment to stop laughing your head off about that one...
After Jen and Chad met up with us again, we chatted a little more, then Jen and Chad said "goodbye" to each other in private (winkwink) and left Butch and I again. Standing there. Feeling pretty dorky. Soooooo....I did what any good, proper, modest, devout Catholic girl would do. I sidled up to him and gave him a huge smackaroonie!
He was shocked (but I didn't find that out until much later!). He was a VERY good kisser! Looking back, I think I did this impulsive thing for three reasons:
1. He looked so goofy there, wondering what would be proper to do, so I decided to take the pressure off of him.
2. I wanted him to know that I really liked him and that I was available for future dates.
3. He was flippin' cute, but it didn't matter that much if he was a bad kisser...so I had to just figure it out asap.
He tasted like strawberry yogurt (I think it was the beer he drank, and the fruit we were munching on earlier). It was nice.
So, the next weekend Jen and Chad called for a second date...this time to the actual movie theater. We went out on our own the following weekend...and the weekend after that...etc., etc.. We outlasted Jen and Chad (Chad eventually married Jen's sister!) and we live, most happily, ever after.
The End
