Sunday, January 01, 2006

Foul mouths, full mouths, good dinner conversation...

I was trying to treat the kids to desert after Katrina's no-so-subtle reminder that we DID have chocolate instant pudding in the cupboard, when the blender I was reaching for fell to the floor into about a gazillion pieces. This is the conversation that ensued from that point on in the dining room as we were finishing up dinner this afternoon (and during and after I was making pudding the old-fashioned way...)

Daddy: O.K. kids, let's say prayers...ready?...In the name of the Fath...
(crash sound)

Mama: oh SH**!!!!!

Kids: What happened, Mama?

Daddy: LAURA! My Goodness, what language...whose the construction worker around here?

Mama: Sorry kids, the blender fell and broke and I shouldn't have said that word. It was a wrong thing to do and I guess I was just too surprised to control my mouth, sorry!

(a few minutes of cleanup later)

Mama: OH! You should probably finish your prayers again, since I interrupted you with my foul the way, pray for my foul mouth, while you're at it!

Daddy: Why would we want to pray for you to have a MORE foul mouth?

Mama: I MEAN, pray so that I DON'T have a foul mouth, silly!

(after prayers and dinner and during pudding)

Matty: (mixing his pudding into a pudding and whip cream sludge)
Stir it up, mix it up, round and round, mix it up...

Niklaus:(copying Matty) Stir it and stir it and...

Katrina: (under her breath)Niklaus see-Niklaus do, huh mom?

Mama: Yup!

Matty: What did you say?

(he has trouble hearing things correctly and offers his own translation, like me!)

Katrina: You know, like, "Monkey see-monkey do??"

Matty: (looking at his chocolate pudding sludge)...Monkey DOODOO????? Ohhh, I get it! Monkey doodoo!

Katrina: (laughing hysterically) NOOOOOO Matty, Niklaus see-Niklaus do, like the saying "Monkey see-monkey do."!!!!

Matty: OHHH, OHhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!

This is the point when we all just "got it" and broke up laughing and it all went downhill after that with the kids making more poop jokes and looking both disgusted and hungry for more pudding at the same time, spitting pudding on the table because of the extra laughing, me trying to maintain decent dinner etiquette,and all the time I'm thinking to myself,

"How the heck did they get to be SO DARN RUDE... talking like this at the's just so uncivilized and crude!"

Hmmmmm, something to think about.

Also, I think I'll skip deserts for a while.